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Bad Actor

by Lee Walker

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1.
Simple Life 02:48
Theres times when all I want is a simple life To lay down beside the same one every night But we can't keep playing pretend All things must meet their end I think somewhere deep down inside we've always known its only right that we'll lead anything other than a simple life Aint nothing simple when you're in love No one's to blame its such a potent drug maybe there's no such thing as a simple life Theres times when all I want is you to be my wife To devote myself like its some god given right But you know im no good at playing house And I know I'm someone you can live without I hope this time for both our sakes you're right I guess I made up my mind when I didn't put up much of a fight I guess somewhere deep down inside we've always known its only right that we'll lead anything other than a simple life Oh baby you know I care Oh how much I miss you being there But theres only so much time In our lives Aint nothing simple when you're in love No ones to blame its such a potent drug there's no such thing as a simple life
2.
Whats it gunna take for you to treat me right Whats it gunna take me to get through the night Why can't I see that you're just one girl And I never really took a chance on this world Why do I get the sinking feeling Things will be different this time Been together so long had our tiffs in the past Nothing that made me think it wouldn't last Spent time apart when we were young But I guess you just didn't get your fill of the fun So here we are again not quite saying goodbye But im afraid it'll be different this time This time will be different That much is clear to me This time the tumor is malignant And im losing faith in recovery This time I know it doesn't matter How much I reason or plea This time your indifference Has me convinced its not meant to be No couple ever really belongs in love Its not some divine rite from the powers above Its a mutual understanding between two adults To do the same thing expecting different results Your damned if you do and damned if you don't So this time I reckon I won't This time will be different That much is clear to me This time the tumor is malignant And im losing hope for recovery This time I know it doesn't matter How much I reason or plea This time your indifference Has me convinced its not meant to be This time your indifference Made me realize what you already see
3.
I used to need you I used to care I used to think you were the only one there But now that you're gone I see I misunderstood This is just the beginning of me doing what I should So I guess I'm saying thank you You were right all along We need to make our own mistakes We need to do something wrong You should have got away You should have got away You should have got away before we realized it was too late I used to believe you when you said you needed me I used to think you were the only one I'd see But in a world full of lovers and players like me and you Whats a boy and whats a girl to do So I guess I'm saying thank you You were right all along We need to make our own mistakes we need to go it alone You should have got away You should have got away You should have got away before we realized it was too late Now we'll find out if its meant to be I guess the choice thats right ain't always the choice that comes easy If you thought the vibe wasn't right you should've just said so I could've spent my whole life content in what I didn't know So here we are parting ways And im wondering if I was just a phase Excuse me if I held you back in convincing you to stay But you got rid of the disease and now you're free to go play Think of all the damage that wasn't done and all the time we saved You should have got away You should have got away You should have got away before it was too late
4.
I spent all day trying to convince myself you're a bitch That you're evil, deplorable, a cold hearted witch But we both know thats not true I know I'll always be in love with you I fell so far down in love I cant stand to fall out Whatever it was then you're sayin its over now I dont hate you like I'm supposed to No I know I'll always be in love with you I wish they would have warned me about girls like you I wouldn't have played the game had I known how much I stood lose Your busy being courted I'm busy in pain At least no one can say that all our love was in vain You were my sweetheart baby my soul mate the one Ooo wee mama we had ourselves some fun But you sent me down the hole for something new Because you know ill always be in love with you! If you didn't want to stay together you should have said from the start I wish I had known that before I gave you my heart Though we cant always be together like we used to I guess I know I'll always be in love with you
5.
Bad Actor 03:27
Been two weeks since shes been gone Im still wondering where I went wrong Of course she said it wasn't me Just that there's more for us to see But I think its asking a whole lot For me to act like I forgot That we were together for so long How could I have acted so wrong They call me a bad actor Because they know I can't pretend Heaven help me when I say I'm on the mend Who do I think im fooling when I say I'm feeling fine Truth be told I lost a girl who was never really mine I'm more trouble than I'm worth and she knows why I'm just a bad actor struggling to get by We broke up two weeks ago But if you saw her I doubt it'd show As for me well I'm a wreck Went and drank my last paycheck But all the liqour in this world Couldn't take my mind off this girl You know I try to play it cool End up acting a fool They call me a bad actor Because they know I can't pretend Heaven help me when I say I'm on the mend Who do I think im fooling when I say I'm feeling fine Truth be told I lost a girl who was never really mine I'm more trouble than I'm worth and she knows why I'm just a bad actor struggling to get by Im spending all my nights alone Too wrapped up in my damn phone I dont drink water or meditate Just google someones daughter and masturbate I dont know how to act at all Too busy wondering if she'll call I try to be a bigger man And find myself acting once again They call me a bad actor Because they know I can't pretend Heaven help me when I say I'm on the mend Who do I think im fooling when I say I'm feeling fine Truth be told I lost a girl who was never really mine I'm more trouble than I'm worth and she knows why I'm just a bad actor struggling to get by
6.
Gettin' Mine 02:09
You say you're not sure who you wanna be in this life Hey thats alright with me the doubt lies on both sides It doesn't really matter where we go No matter what we're gunna turn out fine As long your getting yours ill be getting mine We stayed together 7 years Through all the laughs and all the tears Then one day you decided enoughs enough You were dead set on trying out other stuff The memories still remain But we both know things will never be the same And I just miss the time when our love was all that we needed I miss the time when we wanted nothing more I miss the time we shared behind closed doors But you're not mine, and I'm not yours anymore You say you're not sure who you wanna be in this life Hey thats alright with me the doubt lies on both sides It doesn't really matter where we go no matter what we're gunna turn out fine As long you're getting yours ill be getting mine
7.
Not Your Man 03:01
Doing what I want to in spite of what they say Doing what I want so I can feel okay Only I know where I come from only I know where I've been The time is now just as it was then Ain't nobody gunna stand in my way I never chose to lead this life but at least I have a say I'm not your man I never really was I'm not your man I'm not the one you're thinking of Im nobody but my own And I know I'm not alone Im something bigger and im not yet full grown Can't quite describe it but I trust my gut One things for sure I'm not your man I'm not your man no matter what I won't reduce myself so you can feel comfy Its not my fault that you refuse to be easy Forget about my past I live in the moment and make it last I do what I want because this life moves pretty fast I do what I want in lue of what they say I do what I want and I do it everyday I'm not your man I never really was I'm not your man Im not the one you're thinking of Im nobody but my own And I know I'm not alone Im something bigger and im not yet full grown Can't quite describe it but I trust my gut One thing is for sure I'm not your man I'm not your man no matter what
8.
All there is to know about someone You can tell from the look in their eye All the years long since gone And their memories close behind They'll say I'm okay they'll say I'm good they'll tell you everything is fine But its so easy to tell you lies When deep down we each feel a pain inside Everybody hides and everybody's hurting From the ones who have done them wrong The ones who just won't give the ones who take too long You can walk a thousand miles in their shoes Straight on through the night You'll never learn the reason For anothers plight They probably couldn't tell you Even if they tried So it goes for most everyone Who knows the difference between right and wrong But you know we can be there for eachother if we try Everybody hides and everybody's hurting From the ones who have done them wrong The ones who just won't give the ones who take too long Everybody needs to forgive themselves, maybe we could start out by forgiving someone else Nobody wants to be left behind Its not asking too much to take whats mine Everybody hides inside And everybody's hurting But you can come on out
9.
Bad things happen to everyone And bad things never are too much fun So when they come to pass No need to make it last You just let that shit go But let's say you've finally got a hold of something good It cant last forever but you wish it would It dont mean much how you feel As far as you're concerned thats not a part of the deal You gotta learn to let things go The sooner you do the sooner you grow Whether its good or bad Whether you're happy or sad You cant have something thats already been had There ain't no stopping this show Take it in stride, go with the flow If by now you don't know You gotta learn to let things go So you think you found what you've been searching for all along But before you get a chance to enjoy it, its gone Just cut your loss, no need to turn back now Wouldn't do you any good anyhow Because its all about what serves you Out with the old in with new Wherever you go whatever you do Why get bent out of shape when you're just passing through You gotta learn to let things go The sooner you do the sooner you grow Whether its good or bad Whether you're happy or sad You cant have something thats already been had Because there ain't no stopping this show Take it in stride Go with the flow If by now you don't know You gotta learn to let things go
10.
I've spent my whole life thinking Saving nickels saving dimes Took me so long to realize I've been here this whole time I've spent my whole life waiting For the perfect opportunity I lost sight of the fact That aint nothing come easy But now I'm ready Ready as I'll ever be This trip is heavy Just surrender and the truth will set you free Nobody's perfect Nobody's ever satisfied What does it mean to be free What does it mean to be alive I can do the work I can stand the heat I can live my life on my own two feet Without a need to say I'm sorry Because I'm ready Ready as I'll ever be I broke the levee Got swallowed up into the sea yea At the bottom of the ocean The center of the universe I can show you my devotion I can show you just how much its worth No longer frightened by the notion That we live out everyday planet earth I know I'm ready Ready as I'll ever be I have nothing left to lose What good are choices if you never learn to choose This is once in a lifetime This is a state of emergency We share a moment that is endless What some would call eternity In the space of everything All of those that came before We are here now Always wanting more You know im ready And im ready as I'll ever be A higher power Holding each of us responsible collectively

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Heartbreak is OK

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released August 6, 2021

Lee Walker: vocals, rhythm guitar, drum set, percussion
Lucille Parker: bass
Hope Radford: fiddle
Aika Collins: vocals
Justyn Lewis: lead guitar
Tim Walker: whistle

Captured, mixed, and mastered by Cory Gehrich of Sisterly Silence

Cover art by Kristina Dawn

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Lee Walker Portland, Oregon

Born and raised in the state of Oregon, Lee Walker is a drummer with a penchant for songcraft. In recent years they have enjoyed discovering a voice within the storied tradition of country western music.

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